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Losing Hope

Since I was 16 I've had my parents tell me i need help or need to talk to someone. I thought after i got married things would change, but at least once a week my mom still tells me i need help and my husband tells me i need to leave. Why do i want to hurt the people i love? Is my question to myself everyday. I love my husband more then anything, but i feel so alone all the time with him working 14 hours a day. I try to keep myself busy and not count the hours down till he gets home, but half of the time its all i can think about is him coming home. Then he comes home and the three hours of him being home before its time for bed and it feels like i don't ever get to see him.